I am struck with the paradox that I feel in recent days:
I feel more growth personally but less external connections or expansion.
I feel love more deeply but also more clarity about those things I don’t care for.
I feel more clarity about what is valuable to me and less certain about what is to come.
Jung felt paradox could be a “better witness to truth than a one-sided, so-called ‘positive’ statement.” As such, in its ability to embrace contradiction and both sides of an issue, paradox “… is the natural medium for expressing trans-conscious facts,” and thus is “… one of our most valued spiritual possessions. Quantum physics, for example, is full of paradoxes: What is the nature of light? Is it a wave or a particle? Both. In the same way, we live in a reality that is both determined and indeterminate.
Could it be that our perception of these paradoxes are a reflection of our own expansion? And if that’s a good thing, why does it feel so uncomfortable sometimes? How can we align with opposing directions?
Here’s an example from Celeste:
“I have a situation at home with a loved one that is angry, a lot of the time. This anger makes it uncomfortable for them and everyone around them. They are not open to help or growth. They are over 21 and have every right to make their own choices but not to dictate to others in the house. I feel like I am living with an angry bully, almost everyday. Living in an environment where “sharing” the kitchen for example, is more like a battleground requiring wit, wisdom and cunning. How can I feel this way about a family member? Maybe I’m not giving enough understanding and compassion?
I have wrestled with this dynamic for many years now; have had therapy, readings, read many great books on the topic of healthy boundaries and loving relationships. I am by no means an expert on the topic! But I have much life experience including what does and doesn’t work. At some point we can’t read “the answer” or be told by another what the answer is for us. Thanks to covid, we have both the opportunity to deep dive within the self and the requirement to do so. There’s not as much avoiding it, possible. Spiritual teachers might call this an “accelerated growth” opportunity.
So I am aware that the dynamic with this person has the pattern of an angry bully, so they are not going to be open to reason. They do not want to cooperate, which is abundantly clear. It also makes sense that it would be a relief for them to be directing their anger outside themselves (at me) rather than deal with the personal issues connected to the source of their anger. All of which is important for me to know. therefore, I cannot appeal to that balanced, mature, reasonable and harmonious part of them at the moment. There are times in a human life when you can’t assume or expect someone to be available to be balanced and reasonable.” Very important to access your audience.
“I also have to take responsibility for my grief about this, and my tendency to ignore those facts and pretend they are “okay”, out of my exhaustion or denial. We are more comfortable recognizing that a child for example, needs a nap and not taking their behavior at face value. Of course with a child, I could put them down for a nap! In the case of someone over 21, not so much. Nevertheless, a similar reality in that I cannot take things at face value, I need to use my senses to access the situation, and most importantly, I need to fill my tank so I am not exhausted!!!”
Celeste has awareness of her situation and her responsibilities. She is also aware of some construction responses and options available to her. Can you relate to Celeste?
Consider; an athlete prepares for a competitive event; with rest, food, affirmations, etc. We have the same needs perhaps? How would it be to approach our lives with a similar importance as an athlete approaches a game? Hmmm.
We can’t know what this new year of 2021 will bring. But it is perhaps more clear to identify what not to expect. I don’t expect things to return to “normal” this year. I don’t expect business to stabilize or thrive. I don’t expect I will go anywhere without my mask, that I or others will feel settled this year. If anything, as a “transition” year, it will be unsteady, bumpy, and many new things may be in store that are not yet comfortable. Do I think there will be progress to a “better tomorrow”? YES. And this new Aquarian Age is just,… beginning. Not to be confused with it being in full swing.
We hear people talking about building resiliency, although that is clearly still in the mix, I want to talk about really being clear, honest, and stabilized for what is next. It puts a whole new spin on self care for me. The prospect of challenges that we can see coming, in our home and family. It puts a new filter on our perceptions around things like exercise, rest, etc.
I know Celeste is not alone in the experience of complicated circumstances and challenges. If you are at all gaining anything from this sharing, please know that I and others, might also gain from yours. Our stories might not match or even be very similar; but that is a good thing. Together we cover more surface area and can make connections that create a network of support.
Take stock in your own life and inventory what is ahead for you. Not from an intellectual place of logistics and problem solving so much as from that deeply feminine place of knowing and intuition. Give a voice to the wild unconscious that lives deep within and has been with you for many lifetimes.